In some of my earlier posts, I said how I think relationships and business are interchangeable when it comes to best practices. As a businessman and a single guy, the two topics really fascinate me. I try to be the best business practitioner I can and become successful by reading, studying and always expanding my knowledge in the world of buying and selling and I also find interaction between people to be wildly interesting. The more I looked into it, the more I found connections between the two, so here’s my new lines of postings! Dating and Business Tips from a Single Guy.
[Easy or Desperate?]
There was a girl I knew a few years back (my ex made me stop being friends with her) who was a slut. I knew at least 8 guys who had been with her and heard stories about a dozen more. Everyone knew her though, and she was a nice girl. She had a few close girlfriends and people generally liked her. There wasn’t anything bad you could say about her, other than she was like Dan Cloutier in the playoffs, everyone gets to score.
There was another girl I knew who always went through boyfriends. I swear she probably scoured Asian Avenue and Facebook and poked every guy available. These guys would always turn out to mistreat her and after a couple months of bad, awkward, make up sex, they’d break up and she’d be on the prowl again hooking up with the first guy to exhale in her direction. Girls would always look at her with sadness in their eyes, claiming that she always found the wrong guy and that she deserved better.
First off, why is it always the guy that gets blamed? I don’t think she’d make a good girlfriend anyway and it takes 2 to do the horizontal tango. Secondly, these two girls have probably slept with the same number of guys except one does it freely and the other hides behind bad relationships to do it when it should have been a one night stand to begin with. One was Easy, the other was Desperate. The two are really interchangeable by definition of action. What makes the difference is the attitude. Desperateness is just sad, but if you’re easy at least it’s a choice. Attitude makes the world of difference and changes perspectives viewed from the outside. If you’re going to give it up, at least do it confidently and proudly.
In the world of business, it’s the same. I look at having a job as being in a relationship, and being unemployed is the same as being single. *Disclaimer: Not that I find being in a relationship a job, but rather that there’s commitment, responsibilities, and accountability involved as well. (Nice save Pi!) If you accept the first job offer that comes your way without thought into your own personal needs and wants from that career, it’s not going to work out in the long run. You need to make sure that both the career is right for you and that you are right for that opportunity and not just take it because it was given to you. At the same time, you shouldn’t apply to every job and then quit after working there a day either. Sooner or later no company will want to hire you because of your track record. Even if you don’t sleep with any of them, all those guys you string along makes you look bad too.
Ideally you want to work at a company for a few years and build up your experience (You want to be in a relationship that is solid and lets you grow as a person.) Eventually if things don’t work out, you quit/break up because you’re not happy, you deserve better or because you’re underappreciated. If you’ve built up a strong enough resume; meaning you’ve been faithful, you’ve been supportive, people see that your relationship was great and due to circumstances it just didn’t work out, your chances of finding a great next career/relationship is that much better.
But don’t be desperate. And don’t be easy. Employers/Prospective significant others can smell that and instead of getting the call back for a 2nd interview/date, you’ll just be mulling over whether the ringer in your phone was accidently turned onto silent when really, it just didn’t ring.